For The Anally Inclined 2

This is an opinionated piece of opinionation, followed-up by a FAQ-full of less-opiniated info from a much more respected cyber-writer, about anal sex -- none of which should be discounted because we're both correct, and it all happens to be accurate. You know where your [NEXT] button is... :) --- Bobby

Considering the Fundament

Here's the thing: A young lady's tail-clench is undeniably *cute* -- it winks at you coyly when it's a little nervous, which is always a lovely, sensual thing... And brings such a delicate pastel _blush_ to all four of her cheeks when gentle liberties are taken with it. As well it should! Wouldn't you??

But like most of the more ticklish, luscious, and indescribable ecstasies, Backward Adoration is *best* experienced between completely committed, monogamous couples. Which also removes most of the issues of safety, as well.

FWI(not)W, we've both found it to be a potent way of being that much more intimate with each other, gaining another significant layer of sharing -- and *therefore* highly erotic. There's a potent erotic payoff to emotional intimacy, and successfully sharing something that's misunderstood and even stigmatic, is a relationship-builder unto itself. As most People of Kink already know.

There's no denying that the mechanisms are there for it to be very pleasurable for almost anyone -- those who can't find it so aren't doing it right. And "right" is highly subjective, but basically means NOT approaching it as a goal unto itself, because it's only going to work well (for a lot of people, and most beginners), as something that happens as part of a progression of arousal and intimacy, at the point when all parts of both the body and soul are open and relaxed and craving complete merging.

I read somewhere respectable (though can't quote the source just now) that there are more nerve endings in the anus than any other part of the female body except the clitoris, and any other part of the male body, period.

A nervous point of my own, that happens to make sense, and please don't pelt me with squick-melons: A BIG difference between being erotic with the bottom-hole, and with the vagina, are *sorts* of stimulation that they've evolved to require in order to relax and open and become otherwise engorged enough for pleasurable penetration.

Thinking only *briefly* about the primary purpose of the bottom-hole, we recall that it does, in fact, have the capacity to open pretty significantly, without undo pain, most every day. In that case, though, there is some "stimulation" from *inside* which triggers this dilating reaction.

It's rather reliable, and noticeable, if you're paying attention. And is why ALL the difference in a pleasurable Posterior Exaltation is made from very slowly, very gently, insinuating the finger(s), while simultaneously stimulating other more mainstream things -- *not* just to stretch the wee lil' thing, nor _just_ to get her used to it... But because once there is some comfortable penetration, the stimulation inside will start triggering autonomic responses that will relax and open the target zone impressively.

It's a subtle, but huge, key! Hi ho!!

The place is all wired up for *massive* sensory input, and usually (IMO) needs only some reprogramming of the life-long taboo-software that's been burned in... quite erroneously (as opposed to erogenously) in these civil days of handy antiseptics, and fair understanding of what to keep away from what, hygienically-squeaking.

To the Little Sister who said she'd never participate if she had a choice, but would be doing so for her partner soon, I humbly and respectfully suggest a private journey long before he's given his head on this project. Get yourself to the point I spoke of on your own, with some appropriate substitute for Himself... working hard [in the relaxed, gentle, sensual sense of "hard" :)] to get your lil' bottom used to a small, accommodating visitor (finger), while masturbating, both to link the sensation with pleasure, which our culture taught you fervently must never happen, and thence to find that point where the diminutive visitor "back there" begins to set off opening/relaxing reactions similar to your vagina as you become aroused.

© 1997 by Robert Scott. All rights reserved.
Please don't repost this ANYwhere or make it publicly accessible by such means as
(but not limited to) FTP, mail server, web or archive site without author's explicit permission.
Permission is granted for one hard copy for personal use.
As of Oct97, the author can be emailed:
BobDeb@friend.ly.net




---

Here's a FAQ about anal sex by Elf Sternberg
http://www.halcyon.com/elf

ANAL INTERCOURSE AND ANALINGUS
by Elf Sternberg

Why would anyone want to have anal sex?

For many people, anal sex is the ultimate taboo. Buttfucking makes it sound crude and dirty, sodomy sounds technical. In the 1990's, anal sex has been given the bad rap because of HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, is most easily transmitted by anal intercourse.But some people love anal sex. Others hate it. Others haven't tried it yet and are curious. And many people are attracted to it precisely because it's so taboo and mysterious.

What is analingus?

One other part of the body that some people enjoy licking, or having licked, is the anus. The anus has half the nerve endings in the pelvic region and many people find touching it to be sexually arousing. Although we haven't mentioned safer sex yet as part of this series, we will here: the anus and rectum carry many diseases that live quite benignly in your lower digestive tract, but which can be harmful in your mouth or stomach. Performing analingus is a very risky behavior for a variety of bacterial infections. Refer to the section on safer sex techniques for ways to protect yourself if you or your partner enjoys this activity.

Does anal sex hurt?

Anal sex should not hurt. If it hurts, you're doing it wrong. With enough lubricant and enough patience, it's entirely possible to enjoy anal sex as a safe and fulfilling part of your sex life. However, some people may never like it, and if your lover is one of those people, respect their limits. Don't force the idea upon them.

Can anal sex actually give pleasure?

The pleasure of anal sex is derived from many things. Doing something "nasty" appeals to many people, especially about sex. Doing something different to spice up a sex life that has become something of a bore can be part of it. And the physical sensations available during anal sex are uniquely different from anything else. The rectum is lined with nerve endings, some of which signal the brain to 'reward' you with good feelings when stimulated. For men, the prostate gland can be a source of powerful pleasure. And for a thrusting penis, the tight ring of the anus can be a new and strong sensation to enjoy.

What do I need to have anal sex?

The most important pieces of advice anyone can give on anal sex are: lubricants, condoms, and patience. The most commonly available lubricant is KY-Jelly, a greaseless, odorless substance available at most drug stores. Better lubricants include Astroglide, ID, Wet, or ForePlay, some of which are available at better drug stores, and most of which are available in some form at adult toy stores.Do not buy anything that is oil-based. Make sure the lubricant you buy is rated "condom compatible." Nothing else will do. Oil- based lubricants such as Vaseline or baby oil will destroy a condom long before you're done having sex. And many oil-based sub- stances will coat the lining of the rectum, providing a haven for many potential infections.

Do I have to use a condom?

Even if you're sure that both you and your partner are disease- free, using a condom is still a good idea. The rectum is home to lots of infectious bacteria that can cause burning and urethritis of the penis. It will also help you clean up afterwards.

I'm worried that anal sex will be messy.

Anal sex can be messy, but such a mess can be avoided; after all, most people can tell when they have to go to the bathroom. A condom will help with cleanup, of course, and if you're really concerned, a commercial enema, like Fleet, will help beforehand. If you do use a commercial enema, read the instructions carefully.

How do we prepare for anal sex?

Patience is the third and final thing you need to make anal sex possible. Initial penetration is always the most difficult part of anal sex-- the anus is a tight ring of flesh at the opening of the rectum designed to control the elimination of bodily waste. It is partially under voluntary control, and partially reflexive to stim- ulation. Your partner has to relax, and you have to go slow to coax it into opening enough to receive your penis.Start with a well- lubricated finger or a slim (smaller than your penis) dildo. The dildo is more realistic, but your fingers can flex and feel what they're doing inside her ass. Slide one finger in slowly, letting her adjust to it. Take your finger all the way out, then push it back in again. Give her anus time to get used to this kind of activity. Then slide a second finger in. Consider how big your penis is and realize that two fingers is probably enough.

What position should we use for anal sex?

For actual intercourse, picking a position can be important. Many women want to be on top, to regulate how fast penetration occurs. Other like to lie on their stomachs, or crouch doggy-style, or to be penetrated while lying on their sides. Choose what's best before you start.As always, control yourself. Take your time and use lots of lubricant. People who like anal sex say that "too much lube is almost enough." Listen to your partner-- if she tells you it starts to hurt, back off.Eventually, a time will come during your lovemaking where her anus will relax enough to allow the head of your cock to 'pop' into her. If she is completely relaxed, that pop should feel completely painless. Now just because you're inside her is no reason to start pounding away like mad. Let her body adjust. Take your time. Eventually you will both be ready for more.

Can I get pregnant from anal sex?

It is not *technically* possible to get pregnant from anal sex; there is no way for semen to get from the rectal tract to the vaginal tract. However, anal sex is still not a very good method of birth control. Semen leaking from the anus after intercourse may drip across the perineum (the short stretch of skin separating vulva and anus) and cause what is known as a 'splash' conception. The failure rate for this is surprisingly high! 8% of couples of who use anal sex as a method of birth control have babies each year.

What if I don't like it?

You may find that anal sex just isn't for you. That's fine. Nothing says that you have to indulge in something that doesn't make you feel good. -- Elf Sternberg
elf@halcyon.com
Public key available
http://www.halcyon.com/elf
I'm not inclined to write pompous books about unanswerable questions. That strikes me as a tremendous waste of time. - Stephen Jay Gould